Funny Scottish English St Andrews Golfer Joke
A golfer is playing at St. Andrews on a beautiful hot day when he stops by one of the streams to get a drink. As he puts his hand in to scoop out some water he hears a shout from the greens keeper, "Eh, don drink tha, it's full a cow shite an pish!"
"I'm sorry sir, but could you repeat yourself - I'm from England you see," says the golfer.
"I said: use two hands so you don't spill any!"