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Funny Helen Keller Jokes

Funny Helen Keller Dog Cat Mittens Joke Photo
Funny Helen Keller and her beloved cat, Mittens Joke Photo

What did Helen Keller say when she picked up the cheese grater?
That was the most violent book I've ever read...........

Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow?
Her dog was blind too.

How did Helen Keller break her arm? 
Trying to read road signs at 40mph.

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?
Rearranged the furniture.

Why did Helen Keller go to the hospital?
She tried to read a waffle iron.

Did you know Helen Keller had a playground in her backyard?

Neither did she.

Why is Helen Keller such a bad driver?
Because she's a woman.

What is Helen Keller's favorite color?
Corduroy.

Why does Helen Keller play the piano with only one hand?
Because she uses the other one to sing.


And finally, sung to the tune of Yankee Doodle:

Helen Keller went to town, a-ridin' on a pony, 
Stuck a feather in her hat, and called it "Hunngunnggunufffungg" 


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Featured Joke

"Honey," said this husband to his wife, "I invited a friend home for supper."

"What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I didn't go shopping, all the dishes are dirty, and I don't feel like cooking fancy meal!"

"I know all that."

"Then why the hell did you invite someone for supper?"

"Because the poor fool's thinking about getting married."
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