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Bob's Scrotum

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"And now!" shouted the pastor, wiping his sweaty brow with an unexpectedly large handkerchief. "Who would like to offer up a testimony of thanks to our Father in heaven, who hears and answers all our prayers, amen?"

A number of hands were raised, but a timid woman stood up and made her way to the front.

"Let's hear it for our sister, Suzie!" shouted the pastor.

The congregation applauded loudly and then fell silent.

"Two months ago," she began, "my husband Bob had a terrible bicycle accident, and his scrotum was completely crushed. The pain was excruciating and the doctors didn't know if they could help him."

Muffled gasps from the congregation could be heard.

"He was unable to hold me or the children," she continued, "and every movement caused him terrible pain. We prayed as the doctors performed a delicate operation, and it turned out they were able to piece together the crushed pieces of his scrotum, and wrap wire around it to hold it in place."

The congregation listened in stunned silence.

"And now," she announced in a quivering voice, "thank the Lord, Bob is out of the hospital and the doctors say that with time, his scrotum should recover completely."

For a moment, nobody spoke, but then the pastor stood up awkwardly and shouted, "Amen!", followed by tumultous applause from the congregation.  Suzie smiled and returned to her seat.  The pastor then asked, "Does anyone else have anything to share?"

A man stood up and walked to the podium.  He said, "Hi, I'm Bob."

The congregation held its breath.

"I'd just like to correct a small detail in my wife's testimony.  The word is 'sternum'."

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