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"Hello, is that Mr Jones?"

"Yes, speaking."

"Ah, good morning, sir. I'm calling from Selby Jewellers.  I believe you came into our premises on Friday with a very beautiful young woman, and bought her a £40,000 diamond necklace?"

"Yes, that's right."

"Well I regret to inform you that we still require payment.  The cheque you gave us bounced."

"Yes, I know - there is no money in the account... But let me tell you about my weekend!"

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